We Are Desperate for God to be Real
Thoughts inspired by Simone Weil...
“God is pure beauty.” and… “There is a silence in the beauty of the universe which is like noise when compared with the silence of God.” — Simone Weil, “Implicit Forms of the Love of God”
Beauty is God in motion.
Silence is God at rest.
Beauty is God making a pass at us.
Silence is God waiting to be seen.
Weil writes a little earlier in the same piece that the honest soul must cry out for God even if he doesn’t believe God exists. He cries out not because God exists, but because he is hungry, and that hunger is not belief, but fact. One of our deepest fears as a species is that we are orphans — that there is no loving Parent who made us, that there is no First Cause that loves us or intended us from the beginning. We are as a race deeply terrified of being alone, of being an accident, a fluke of evolutionary processes, without purpose, without meaning, without love.
Our souls cry out for God because we are desperate for God to be real. At least the honest souls among us do. The rest cry out for God in a myriad of veiled ways designed in one way or another to assuage their hunger for God while simultaneously convincing themselves they have no hunger at all.
Thus the mother loses herself in her children. Thus the father loses himself in his work. Thus the scientist loses herself in her science. Thus the artist loses himself in his art. Thus the addict loses herself in her addiction. Thus the warrior loses himself in his war.
All loss of our true self stems ultimately from an attempt to hide, suppress or deny our hunger for God. Why? Because dulling your awareness of your hunger for God is far easier than facing the possibility that God may not be real.
Squarely facing that dark possibility with eyes wide open while refusing to disconnect from your own deep hunger for God is what Saint John of the Cross called the Dark Night of the Soul. Yet every seasoned mystic knows that this is the only gateway to true unveiled intimacy with God. To know God as God is, you must confront every possibility about God that you fear might be true—including the possibility that he isn't there at all. Only when all of our fear-based constructs are stripped away can we finally recognize God and fall in love with him in all the true ways he reveals himself.
Thus the mother finds God in the love for her children. Thus the father finds God in the virtue of his work. Thus the scientist finds God in the beauty of her science. Thus the artist finds God in the transcendence of his art. Thus the addict finds God in the suffering of her recovery. Thus the warrior finds God in the sacrifice of his love.
God is everywhere, moving; everywhere, seeking; everywhere waiting to be recognized by us, that we may at last run to him, and find Home.
Here’s a few questions I’m pondering today:
What do I do with my hunger for God?
How do I engage it?
In what ways do I try to hide, suppress or deny it?
