On the Question of Whether Your Voice Matters

…and why, ultimately, it is the wrong question

“All my desires draw me more and more in a direction: to be little, to be nothing, to rejoice in your imperfections, to be glad that you are of no account in the universe. This is the only liberation, the only way to solitude.” — Thomas Merton

Before we can settle comfortably into our true voice in the world, we must resolve within ourselves the question of our mattering. The soul who believes he must prove his voice matters will always be plagued with anxiety and self doubt — for how can he prove beyond doubt a thing that is unprovable? But if she believes she must prove her worth; earn, as it were, her place at the table, then her voice will always carry the taint of neediness and desperation. She’ll want approval. She’ll seek permission to speak from those she deems as mattering more. She’ll want these things more than she cares for what she has to say.

This will be her undoing.

Here is the simple truth: Your voice already matters. It matters to God, and it matters to you, and that is more than enough. That question is no longer on the table. You have a right to be here, a right to bring your voice to the world, and nothing to prove as you bring it. Does the meadowlark have to prove his right to sing his song over the fields? Does the humpback whale need to prove to the world she has something of merit to say before she sings her song to the sea?

Of course not. That would be silly. It’s silly when we try to do it, too. We cast our voice out into the darkness, and when we hear nothing but darkness in reply, we think it is a judgment. It’s the world evaluating what we said and finding it so banal to be unworthy of comment.

But that is where the paradox comes in. For once you are settled in the truth that your voice matters to God, then you’ll find to your great relief that it no longer matters whether it matters to anyone else. This assumption of mattering is the source of the extraordinary freedom and joy we hear in the song of the meadowlark and the humpback whale. It does not matter to them whether anyone approves of their singing. It only matters that they sing. 

So, be little. Be nothing. Be glad you are of no account to the crazed and frenzied-fast world.

Just sing, as you were made to sing, 

This is your liberation. 

Such an enviable state is the goal of every free soul, and every true artist.