Am I One of Those People Now?

Questions on faith, foolishness, and following Jesus

“Our job is not to figure out the how. The how will show up out of a commitment and belief in the what.” — Jack Canfield

For all of my adult life — the sensible years of it, anyway — I have thought this a ridiculous idea. “Just have faith,” has been the battlecry of many a failed artist or would be entrepreneur. It takes more than blind confidence to create something that has substance and impact in the world, or, more importantly, carries any of the weight of actual truth. Ideas are not true because we believe in them. They are proved true or false on their own merit, whether we believe in them or not. 

Yet here I am, just turned 60 two days ago, living in a van to make myself as available as I possibly can be to the leading of God’s Spirit, so I can follow Jesus like the disciples of old followed him, and when he says “go there,” I go, and when he says, “come here,” I come. But today – and there are many days like today — I’m waiting to get my van worked on. I’m doing laundry at the laundromat. I’m taking a shower at a local gym. And I think, “ Is this it? Is this the supernatural life? Is this what following Jesus is meant to look like?”

Then, to my horror, that dreaded phrase bubbles up unbidden from the tar pits of my religious memory.

“Just have faith,” it gurgles. And then, “Your job is not to figure out the how. The how will show up out of a commitment and belief in the what.”

I shudder. Am I one of those “just have faith” people now?